Relevant Church

I know it has only been a couple of days, but we are giving this whole “ride the train” idea a try and so far I am pretty impressed. It actually happens more often than we realize. Leslee (my absolutely wonderful wife!) and I will watch a movie or read something or see a news story or even just have a conversation with someone. Of course after it is all over she would like to know my thoughts. Always before I would say I didn’t know what to think or maybe I would say something just to satisfy her need. But it usually would end there without any real conversation or thought exchange between us. Most of the time it goes unnoticed, but there are times where my wife really needs me to voice an opinion on something. In these cases we would either come to the conclusion that I am an emotionally repressed idiot or perhaps even an argument would ensue. I have actually lived under the belief that I am an emotional idiot for my entire life.

Now we are able to step back and give me the time I need to process my thoughts without an argument and without me feeling like an idiot. It’s great! I have spoken up and told her that I needed to ride the train on a question she asked and she steps back and is OK with waiting for my train to come back around. I do believe that this is the perfect opportunity to get out of a tough conversation, but whether the man wants to or not the woman will eventually snatch him from his comfy seat on the train. I have done a good job so far remembering that when the train comes back around that I need to tell her what I have discovered. Like I said it has only been a couple of days so the practice thus far has been pretty simple subjects without much importance. I do have a fear that when it comes time that we are in a heated debate (that’s PC for fight) that either she will not want to give me the time I need to ride the train or I will use the train ride to get out of the situation and hope never to return to that station. I do think, however, that this practice of riding the train on the small stuff will help when it comes time for something bigger.

Until then I know that on an every day basis my marriage is enhanced by a deeper and more intimate level of conversation. It feels really good to exchange real thoughts and real ideas with the person I consider to be my best friend.

- Bill