Hey guys, Haas here. The burst training video will be up pretty soon, sorry for the delay. Me and Paul have been too busy cruising the beach in our Camero listening to the new Scorpions album to get any work done. Check back in a little while.
Author Archive for Jarrett
If you are a Christ-follower, what influence does faith have on your dating decisions?
That is part of the question from day 12. I want to give my answer to that question, which may or may not make sense. How’s that for a disclaimer?
My faith is the most important thing in my life. It’s basically how i make all of my decisions. But i recognize that the way i live out my faith is probably pretty different from a lot of people, and I think that’s ok. So first and foremost, for me to be in a serious dating relationship, you have to have “a faith in Jesus”. That’s pretty vague, but that’s on purpose. I know people will quote the “equally yolked” verse, but who knows exactly what that means. If you have a faith, and you are honestly trying to live it, then you make the cut. From there it gets tricky. Something that is personally important to me is balance. I think as people we often spend too much time dealing with and living in extremes. I don’t think that’s the best way to live. So, I like a girl who can have balance. And i think the most important area to have balance in is our culture. I want a girl who is comfortable with Christ and culture. I want to be able to sit and talk about calvanism vs arminianism. But i also want to go see the new Will Ferrell movie. And I want to go talk about it after… in a bar… over drinks. I want a girl who can encourage me in my faith, but who can also realize that quoting a simple bible verse at me when I’m upset probably won’t cut it. I want to listen to Derek Webb with her, and then tell her why Tupac is the greatest artist that has ever lived. So yes, faith is very important to me. But most important is a girl with a mature faith that realizes we are in this world, this culture, and she’s not afraid of it.
We just received this from Karie:
I’m one of the singles taking the challenge, however I have been in a long term relationship for 3 years. I decided that this would be a really good thing for us, and fairly easy since we are not currently living together at this time, and only get to see each other twice a week. My boyfriend was not very “pumped” about the challenge, yet he said “I can do this NO PROBLEM!” This has definitely opened up lines of communication between the two of us. I have learned that sex is a very big part of the relationship for intimacy - but definitely not the most important! I need honesty and affection from my partner.
I have to admit, today above all days I was tempted for some additional intimacy since he will be visiting, but then I saw the daily Bible Verse for today and this is what it said:
“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God” 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 NIV
Talk about God having my back when Satan was out to get me! Throughout this challenge - I am learning above all, that I need to put God first above all things, more than my boyfriend, myself, or anything else. Through Christ all things are possible.
Karie
So day 7 is in the can for me, and I’m looking forward to day 8. Things have been really good so far. The guide has been helpful, but what has impacted me the most is community with others. One of the things I find me and my friends thinking about is really examining ourselves. It’s funny, life is so busy, you can go a really long time without ever having to take stock of yourself. You know, who you are, who you’re becoming… what you’ve done. This is forcing me to look at “the man in the mirror”. I wrote this blog a long time ago on my own site, and it was called “Lucky Vampire”. It was basically about how vampire’s are so lucky because they can avoid having to see themselves in the mirror. I’m still envious of that sometimes. I challenge singles, all of us, to really look at our past relationships. What have we done that we regret? What have we done to sabotage something good? What patterns do we see ourselves fall into? And maybe, if we’re lucky, what have we done right?
We just got this from Jake.
Paul and Relevant church.
I wanted to share what I have been learning over the last week.
Since the challenge started, I have been really asking God to reveal not only what I can do to please Jennifer, but what I can do to please God. I have had up and down periods of my life when I have become more or less dependent on my own personal sin, then that of keeping my sexual desires solely for my wife. What I mean is, not physically cheating on my wife, but mentally. My eyes have always been my downfall. Going to web sites I shouldnt, feeding off of images that dont gratify and make you feel guilty for doing so.
But over the last week I have avoided images or diverted my eyes from things I shouldnt see, that detract from the purity of my marriage. I have seen that I can win this battle over my lust with God’s help. This isnt to say I havent been tempted or that images that I shouldnt see have graced my screen or my vision, but when those images came up, I quickly diverted my eyes and quickly asked God for pure thoughts. I have also been showing my love for Jennifer with things I have been neglecting and on the house for the incoming baby.
I know the battle isnt over, but as a married man, satan attacks his hardest when we think we are invulnerable to attack. I just wanted to share that God is slowly freeing me of my lust and I want to say that to any married or single men out there, guard your eyes, because even lustfully looking is the same as doing the act itself.
I am incredibly thankful I am forgiven and that God is merciful in His love.
Jacob
So you’re taking the 30 day sex challenge, and you’re single. So no sex for 30 days. But what does that mean, exactly? The question in todays guide really got me thinking. I think one of the problems that we, as a culture (and more specifically ME) have, is the idea of the line in the sand. As singles, we can easily spend too much thought and time on trying to figure out where this line is. You ask yourself “what constitutes as sex,” or, “how far is too far?” But, I’m starting to realize that’s the wrong way to think about things. Instead of trying to see what we can “get” or how far we can go, I think it’s time we start honoring each other. I admit, I don’t know exactly what that looks like, but I’m ok with that. I’ve lived the alternative, and it got me inching to the line, then peaking past it, and finally running through it and apologizing later. I don’t want to do that anymore. One of the things I’m most excited about in this challenge is learning how to show someone that I am in this for them, not for me. If you’re like me, most of your relationships look like something out of a counting crows song, a little sad (or maybe a lot) and a little messed up (ha, or maybe a lot). I have been so encouraged by hanging around my married friends, and them showing me the right way to do it. They prove to me it is possible to have a real, loving relationship. They are a living, breathing example of the other thing I feel we are offering singles at our church… and that’s hope.
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